November 28, 2007

Evolution for Dummies

I have a theory. I think Indians are just a step away from being the most evolve species in the world. Take a good look around people and what do you see- people, people and more people. But if you continue top look closer you'd see that there are cows, dogs and donkeys. What does this tell you? I think co-existing with animals on a daily basis is nothing short of evolving to the ultimate level.

Life is fast becoming a bad 1980's video game. Every time I get on the streets I feel nothing less than Racer X from Speed Racer for I have to survive all sorts of obstacles. In addition to the humans pretending to be animals that seemed to have strayed onto four lane roads accidentally there are animals masquerading to be humans, behaving as though they are in front of because of some diving intervention. We don't mind the cows or the donkeys even if they cause massive traffic jams. Imagine cars packed bumper-to-bumper in front of you, you'd be honking your heart out but when you realize that it was an innocent looking cow that caused it you just forget the entire episode as if it never happened.

Now isn't that a sign of co-existence?If that doesn't surprise you then picture a dead cow or dog on the streets. Now do you recall the near perfect maneuvering of vehicles that you see people practice near the carcass? Isn't that another sign of returning to how it was before man decided to have it his way? If that is the case, then why do I think we are one step away from being the completely evolved species? That's because there are other little things we need to strike a chord with and the picture would be complete. These little things include other humans like your neighbor, your annoying childhood friends, your folks, the people who take your parking space at malls, the waiters who take ages to serve, people who can't brew decent coffee, your ex girlfriends and boyfriends and the likes.

It's nothing short of amazing that you might not mind a bloody dog forcing you to run over someone in front of you but you'll curse the daylights out of the guy in the car next to you for honking to get your attention. Maybe the person next to your car wasn't hugged enough as a child so why can't I ignore the non-stop honking on his/ her part? Or better still we will revere a cow but let it run amok on the busiest streets in the name of harmony offered by peaceful co-existence of one and all but have a problem with Taslima Nasreen living in Kolkata?

If you ask me I blame Ms. Nasreen for it. Before you shake your head in horror at my suggestion consider this for a moment: you are thrown out of your country (the reason could be the cause of an intellectual argument that might never end, ever), you bunk in Paris for a while, get a Swiss passport. You eventually land up in India. You have written a book that has pissed off the people in your country (the reasons could be the cause of an intellectual argument that might never end) and suddenly people, who speak the same language as the one in your country and the one you wrote the book in, want you out off Kolkata (the reasons could be the cause of an intellectual argument that might make no sense whatsoever). Ms. Nasreen could stay anywhere in Incredible India but nothing short of the city of joy would do it for her. Why is she she pretending to be some character out of some old Ritwik Ghatak film who still believes that Bengal is one unified state? But then what can I say, she's a writer so she is bound to be off her rockers! Good for you Ms. Nasreen but you must realize that people here are busy appeasing gods and cows and dogs.

No one has time for reality.

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